Heck, I don’t know.
But I was once as painfully secular, as pride-fully assured in my own intellectual superiority as any of the very best Atheists out there. I wondered at the folks going into and out of churches but could not find a rationale for entering myself. I was more like the folks trying to fill the empty spaces in their lives with consumer goods and cheap and quick entertainments, lost and searching for meaning that always escaped me, or trapped within the internal struggle to give myself a meaning, to find something that pleased me to pursue, that pleased me to accomplish.
When Faith entered me it was like a slap in the face. No, it was more like those Polar Bear Plunges that people do to show their mettle. It was an all over body shock only I was not prepared for it like the polar bear folks are.
That’s what faith means to me, that slap in the face, knocked to your knees on the road to Damascus feeling that there is more out there than stuff, money and more stuff. It is the knowledge that we are at our best as a species when we strive for the sake of others, and not simply focusing on ourselves. It is the awakening that I had in my thirties and I am dying to share that with others.